Whose Rules Rule? - Part Twelve
Should we try to avoid offending people?
This is the last part of this series and I would be
surprised if I haven't offended anyone by what I've been saying over the past
few months. As I've said throughout the series, talking about morality can be
unpopular in a culture that is based on the ultimate final authority of self. A
detached discussion is almost impossible, since we are moral beings, when most
people see themselves as ultimately in control of what defines right and wrong
in their own lives.
And yet this is something that Christians are rightly very
sensitive about. Paul says in 1 Corinthians 10:32, "Give no offense to
Jews or to Greeks or to the church of God," meaning give no offense to
anyone. Jesus said, "Judge not, that you be not judged." (Matthew
7:1) We know we have good news to share with people, we want to share it, and
offending people causes them to shut their ears and refuse to listen to it. We
don't want to judge people, because we know that we too are sinners and are
only saved through God's grace in Christ. To try to remain at peace with those
around us, so that we may have opportunity to share the good news of the grace
of God in Christ with them, is a very laudable aim.
So I want to make two points. First, I want both Christians
and modern non-religious people to understand that simply talking about
morality, saying that something is wrong, immoral, unrighteous, or sinful, is not in itself being judgmental. A
judgmental attitude involves portraying ourselves as better than someone else,
looking down on them. Romans 14:10 makes this clear: "Why do you pass
judgment on your brother? Or you, why do you despise your brother? For we will
all stand before the judgment seat of God." Paul equates passing judgment
on someone with despising them, and his reason for saying that it's wrong is
that we are all equally deserving of judgment. That ties in with something I
talked about in parts 7 and 8.
That's why I have spent such a long time trying to get
across that the difference between Christian morality and non-religious
morality needs to be understood. Non-religious people understand discussions
about morality within their own frame of reference, and that is that all
morality is relative and guided by our personal preferences. Christian
morality, however, does not fit into that. We have an objective basis for our
moral code.
So simply saying something is wrong is not being judgmental.
Saying something is wrong in a way that despises other sinners and puts
ourselves in a superior position is
being judgmental, and is not speaking in the way Jesus would want us to. So we
need to learn a compassionate way of speaking about morality, one that makes it
clear that we are equally under the law and equally sinners, and that the
reason for our talking about morality is in order to lead them into the way of
salvation. We want to see them saved, we want them to have eternal joy and
life, we want them to find true fulfilment. But they will not get that without
recognising and repenting of their sin.
And neither can we say we are better because we have
repented and turned to Jesus in faith. Faith is itself a gift from God
(Ephesians 2:8,9). We are, without the work of God within our hearts, dead
in trespasses and sins (Ephesians 2:1-7). Jesus himself said that we must be
"born again" (John 3:3) in order to see the kingdom of God - in other
words something must happen to us that we cannot initiate ourselves. Our
salvation, as Christians, is dependent entirely on God's grace.
If the people we speak to will listen carefully and
graciously, then they may at least understand this point, even if they don't
come to accept God's authority in all things including morality. On the other
hand, it may lead them to take even greater offense.
You see - and this is my second point - even when people see
clearly that we don't judge people automatically by making moral statements
about right and wrong, the Christian message may still be offensive to them.
Paul talks elsewhere about, "the offense of the cross" (Galatians
5:11).
Why would the wooden cross that was used to kill the Lord
Jesus Christ be offensive? Because it demonstrates the justice of God, the kind
of wrath He pours out on disobedience. It demonstrates that no one can see
themselves as automatically "in" with Him, but they must go through
His Son, Jesus Christ. The cross demands repentance, it demands we put our
faith in someone who is genuinely better than us, genuinely greater than us. He
is perfect, and yet He suffered death for our sake. But we don't want to be
told what to do, who to have faith in. We don't want to submit to anyone. We
love our sins, our sinful personal preferences. Repentance is an utterly
repugnant idea to us.
We hope that people will accept our message, but we should
not expect everyone to do so. Paul said of his own ministry, "For we are
the aroma of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who
are perishing, to one a fragrance from death to death, to the other a fragrance
from life to life." (2 Corinthians 2:15-16) In other words, if God is
working light and life within a person, He will use our words to save them. But
if not, our words will be to them an offensive, deathly stench that will only
push them further away.
Therefore, we should not tone down our message simply
because people are offended. When people are offended we need to understand
that they are feeling threatened by the very core truth of the gospel - that we
are responsible to God and we have failed Him and deserve His wrath. That is
actually a good thing. Without seeing that, no one would be able to understand
the need for faith and repentance.
To put it another way, following the parable I gave last
time, if I were to offend people by warning them that they are going the wrong
way on a countryside walk, and are heading towards a cliff edge and towards
certain doom, what should concern me most? The fact that those people are
annoyed with me? Or the fact that they are continuing towards the edge of the
cliff? What would I do? Stop talking about the fact they're going the wrong
way, because they want me to shut up? Or keep talking, finding any way possible
to get them to realise that they are in danger?
So I hope we are all, by now, challenged to keep talking
about morality, to base our moral statements/arguments firmly on what is in
God's Word, to use the opportunity to expose the bankruptcy of non-religious
foundations of thinking, to recognise where the offense we cause is because of
the truth, and to love the gospel and love our Saviour all the more.
To Jesus Christ be all the glory. Amen.
